Category Archives: Living beyond hurt

Giving Birth to a New USA

On the very day that we laid to rest one of our  greatest human rights leaders of our time this :

I am a mom to a compassionate ,  intelligent young woman .  Her kind and giving heart stands up for injustices against those with less privilege  . People  that suffer because of having  less privileges  and opportunities  simply because of the color of their skin .  I am of the same heart  and mind as my daughter .  Since early in my youth I have felt the call to stand up for human rights , protesting peacefully , writing  letters to legislators , volunteering  and …listening .  And today my daughter faced the ugliness of hatred  because  of her values and principles   . She has Black Lives Matter written on the  back window of her car . She has other pro human rights sentiments  on her window as well .

Today , of all days ,  someone  chose to threaten her life because of it . A man chose to follow her off of a freeway exit , he sped up along side of her and turned  his vehicle inwards towards  her car  as if to ram her and to force her off of the road .  A life threatening action that could  have been catastrophe with   irreversible results .  And all because he did not like her opinions . He violently opposed her  values . His risked her  life as well the lives of others by his actions .

Here we are America . Threatening each other  over human rights . Over what it means to be considered a human being .  Wiling to end another persons life because she or he stands up for social justice .  It’s time to give birth to a new USA .

The process is painful .  My hope is that what is taking place now with the violence against peaceful protests and individuals  is like the birthing process .  It is  a struggle . It is painful and it is violent . And at the other side of it a more just , equitable  and compassionate country .

The people fighting against the changes have caught the disease of hatred and fear . Desperation  has taken hold of them .  They are entangled within their own chains . How might we set them free from the hate ?

In the darkness of such hate we must be the light .  Carry a peaceful heart and in the words of Mr.Lewis ” make  good trouble ” .

 

 

Above the Gases

How to see through the smoke ?

Soldiers in streets uninvited ,  The people rising . Higher  than gases .

Division , is it’s fate to become unified ?

Human history as a recipe repeated .

We will take back our sovereignty .

 

Tears are Not Enough . Period .

Born white and free

and

in ways i did not see .

Until I became a latch key child  .

As I grew I rebelled against the white cocoon

and paid a price for it .

Not as dear  though as the price paid by African Americans

to simply live .

Or rather …not to live .

What good are my tears for you ? I must use my voice and body to join with yours .

Lead me through this battle with you

and

lets make lasting change .

Aloneness During Covid 19

Living alone while covid 19 changes the world forces emotions to the surface and

brings a new focus to  the smallest delights .  The aloneness is magnified from what is was

before .  Suddenly those solitary evenings that seemed to go on for too long and  could be

soothed into comfort  with the knowing that in the morning it would be whisked away with

commotion  was gone . The commotion  of being busy and surrounded and connected to other

people  gone . Now   walking along a trail in a park , mask covered mouth and nose while

passing  from a distance  a mother and child and suddenly a small child’s smile takes on a

whole new meaning .  Noticing the little things like we did when we were children but now

there’s no rush to be at work or to get home to bed for a speedy night’s sleep . The aloneness

before had it’s challenges too though back then there was hope of a plan or a visit or busy work

day to carry through to relief or comfort .

The phone calls and text messages become a lifeline .  Each one opening the way to

connecting to our shared plight and to our humanity and our  hope .

The tension builds  beneath the surface silently . Moment by moment without

entirely knowing that it’s there the layers of uncertainty and loneliness  are building shelves

inside of you.  And  the beautiful , unexpected miracles of noticing an innocent smile or the

kindness of a stranger or the vibrant colors of the sky and my heart swells with a love from

before my existence  . A  love that has carried us through all of time . Tears well up in my eyes .

Is it the striking aloneness that I feel or the love that is so deep for all of life that makes it so  the

tears must flow .  When sleep finally comes it’s comfort is a delight and in the morning the hope

and the search for the little things will begin again .

 

 

Mon Coeur

Healing

When the broken bits arise from your heart  and ask for healing will you welcome them ?   Love them  and  accept them  and then the peace will come .  in time , more and more , the peace of acceptance and love will grow  .

Every part of yourself deserves the healing of  love .  The freedom to live in the sureness of acceptance and generosity  . When the heart is open and with out self imposed  restraints  the beauty of living flows like a glorious  river .  Healing and abundant  lifting us all into a state of grace .

Free to Roam

Free  to roam as the pieces that once baffled and brought tears of questions

roll over . Rolling over like the swells of ocean waves .

Transforming from a silent , soulful burden or thunderous , passionate outpouring

into wings open wide and strong .  Soaring beautifully with the breezes ,  playfully diving

downward then swiftly upward once again .

The heart once again free to roam .

Come Back

Come back . Come back to the trust in your heart .  Remember  a moment when your heart was repelled by hate and all you wanted was the feeling of home . The feeling of being loved in spite of hard times . The feeling that somehow it is all going to be fine .

Come back . Come back to the truth that you care . Have you been hidden from compassion because fear made you chase circles of lies  ? It’s ok to put down the fear and to feel what’s real.

Come back to all humanity and be free .

A Man Standing Alone

A man standing well off to the side of a convenience  store .  Looking cold from the chill in the air and with a well worn roller bag next to him  . Big eyes with a look of kindness  against his weathered face which clearly held some stories .

Suddenly i was looking to see if I had any cash with me . Yes, I did . It was a moment of certainty after that .  I walked towards him .  He was gracious and thankful .  He began to say something . He hesitated seeming lost a bit .  ” You don’t have to tell me your story  because I already understand it ” I said .  A moment of connection that takes me to my heart .

The Gift of an Eagle

Late afternoon sun inspiring a drive to the water’s edge  .  The  coolness in the air nearly stopped a walk on the beach .  It was a day that could have been early spring or  fall .  The light from the sun was diffused  by clouds and yet also giving a comforting warmth in the breezes .

I stopped at a bench and sat for a bit .  It was low tide though the water seemed to be coming back in . Small waves on top of small waves and the light shimmering and dancing along the water’s surface . Looking out and looking in as I sometimes call it .  Looking beyond the day’s events and freeing one’s mind .

It was just then that I noticed a bird sitting atop of a piling , exposed by low tide ,  out in the water .  Looking more intently  I reared that it wasn’t just any bird but rather an Eagle . I remained for a bit longer .  I began hoping that I’d get to witness his flight and just as I stood up to go this wonderful bird took flight  from his perch .

He soared with such grace and beauty .  I stood watching , taking it in , and whispering ” thank you .”

Where the Comfort Lives

Comfort in my wings

and freeing  souls to sing .

Carried into life unloved and unknown  .

Is now the time to be seen ?

Unfurling the wings in time .

Soaring into light

to live and to give and give .

A sweet sound comes alive

as laughter comes to reside .

And in my heart will

always

be

love and love and love .

'Release'    soft chalk pastels    2012 #11

‘Release’ soft chalk pastels 2012
#11